Pabst Blue Ribbon Announced today that it will be re-branding as Pabst Participation Ribbon.
A spokesperson for Pabst stated: “We have come to realize that Minnennials/Generation Y, (People born between 1981 and 1997), who were the first generation to be awarded trophies for just showing up, may be offended by the thought of a ‘blue’ ribbon.”
The blue ribbon has been traditionally known as a sign of high quality, and is believed to have originated as a prize awarded for the fastest crossing of the Atlantic Ocean by passenger liners.
“We just saw the writing on the wall”, said the spokesperson, (literally, someone spray painted “Participation Counts Too!” on the wall of the MillerCoors brewery where PBR is currently brewed), “and felt it was best to adopt a name that is more inclusive.”
Pabst declined to speculate about the likely change of the PBR abbreviation to PPR (a sound commonly associated with the sound made by contented cats), and the possible offense such a change might cause in dog owners.